My grandmother’s house has a certain smell. I’ve never identified it as say Chanel no. 5, which she had on her dressing table, yet it is just as much a signature scent. A combination of lilly of the valley, cedar and (likely) moth balls, every time I walked into her house, this soothing scent was like baker’s vanilla to my soul putting me at ease. When she died, I thought she would take this signature scent with her, but when I went back to her house, which had been sitting there empty since she died a year ago this past January, the painful final memories I have of her fighting her death with every ounce of life force she had left (which wasn’t much by then) were erased by that glorious perfume, the same as I remembered. I loved her; I loved her smell for the physical, visceral way it brought her right back to me.
My grandmother had a Taurus Moon. Taurus is the sign of the Bull. Emotionally stubborn, like Bull, she obstinately refused to face many things in life (she was an Aries, too). But she instantly put anyone at ease with her simple presence, easygoing nature, and her instinct toward material security, comfort and well-being. Read more
Last night I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t stop thinking of a conflict I’m experiencing. It’s not a new one, it’s an ancient Plutonian one- the worst kind! As I lay there looking at the ceiling, scanning my higher mind for a solution, I attempted to quell the rising adrenaline by breathing deeply and feeling my body. Something popped into mind, My heart feels divided. Lately I’ve realized I can identify when a choice is wrong for me when, while sitting in the space of a potential scenario or choice, I have a physical sensation of mis-alignment. That’s when I know the integrity of a decision is off. This tells me two things: my heart is not at peace, and any decision made from this space, even if right, will be wrong. Read more