Archives for October 2012

Taurus Full Moon: Slow & Easy

One of the more profound commitments to myself that I’ve made this year is to slow down. Why? I realised I was no longer enjoying myself. It wasn’t for lack of opportunity for fun, but that the pace I thought was natural for me, busy, striving, accomplishing, wasn’t, and it wasn’t conducive to pleasure, either.

Give me a day to myself and I’d pack so much into it that I’d forget to enjoy myself. The problem with this way of being is, the better part of pleasure and happiness is relaxation, and relaxation has an easy pace. This inability to slow down not only caused my serotonin to dip…it even trickled down into the most intimate parts of my life – my sex life. Dear reader, my ability to enjoy sexual intimacy stopped. Even with all the right elements in place (atmosphere, mood, well rested-ness) orgasm can be an exceedingly delicate, mysterious feat for any woman, but without truly and deeply slowing down, making the space and time to calm down and be present to the body and senses, that ultimate surrender is elusive. [Read more…]

Libra New Moon: A Little Too Polite

Catching up with my good friend and fellow astrologer, Jonathan Pearl, we checked in on each other’s relationships. He’s in a great one, and so am I. But things had been hard for a couple of years, and JP recently heard about this for the first time. When he asked me what had changed in retrospect, I started in on my usual five-minute monologue. House renovations, step-parenting… the love drug of five romantic years would have to give way eventually. Being absorbed into the lives of five other people, I started to gravitate away from my center, my Self. Then there was the looming fact that every time I took an opposing view to the masses I was deathly afraid of being perceived as “mean stepmom,” so I would try and be nice, and when that didn’t work, I’d stuff it. Meanwhile, all the energy it took to rein in my desires made me angry, tired and nasty (naturally). Not until I stopped being so nice, taking care of everyone feelings, and essentially acted first and apologized later, did things radically shift.

Then Jonathan asked, Did you watch the presidential debate? I cringed. Thus began my “shoulds”: I should be more politically informed. Honestly I started to listen but…it was too painful. Obama’s depression, his world weariness — it wasn’t a lack of preparation, but battle and compassion fatigue. Then JP said, “I came across this quote Obama made in response to the Romney debate and I’m going to tell it to you because it applies as much to you as my partner, who is incidentally having problems with her employees to whom she has been very accommodating, and was repaid for her kindness by being taken advantage of.”

Here’s the golden Obama quote which in context I doubt I will ever forget: “In retrospect, I suppose I was being too polite.” [Read more…]

Saturn In Scorpio: The Irresistible Pull of Transformation

“..light’s blinding no way dividing what’s yours or mine when everything’s shining/Your darkness is shining, my darkness is shining, have faith in our selves…” Truth by Alexander

Want to do that life-changing thing you’ve been putting off for so long? Are you ready for transformation– and deathly afraid of it? Want a deeper relationship to your self, your body, the people you love -to life itself? They say to truly live, we’ve got to be willing to die; to claim our power we must look at what we reject, fear, call “bad” or “wrong” in our self. To befriend our wholeness in totality, we need to bring the darkness in our Self, to light. Welcome Saturn’s entry into Scorpio (10/5/12 -9/17/15, with 12/23/14-6/16/15 in Sagittarius).

The Irresistible Pull Of Transformation

Change and transformation – how to do it, what’s keeping us from achieving the transformation we soul desire, holds a special magnetism while Saturn transits Scorpio. Like reaching the promised final layer of an onion, many of us will want to address that thing holding us back from full-on transformation. Once we sing that battle cry for change, we will also likely instantly run into our own defenses and resistance to letting go into change.  As one women said to me recently, “I want to change – but on my own terms!” Of course Life will not oblige that request. We cannot give Life a list of our conditions and terms for our change and transformation any more than we can ask for a money back guarantee on a potentially rewarding/risky investment. During Saturn’s transit through Scorpio we may feel afraid to change, of death, loss, yet the pull of transformation is irresistible and related to our maturity. We need to clearly see death, change, loss, psychological awareness as apart of a leading a whole life. No more deceiving our self, or others -God of Karma, Saturn, won’t let us get away with it.  If Saturn in Libra left us with a legacy, it’s this: the full truth is far more satisfying than half-truths. [Read more…]