With three teenage step daughters in the house, one might think I’d grow accustomed to the phrase “That’s not fair”. Nope.

Usually it’s around dinner time, one girl is lounging while another helps – justifiably annoying. Or the table having been set, the milk poured, and one milk glass forgotten – who will fill the final glass? The most poignant, curious times though are when one girl asks another for help and help is denied, for various reasons – it’s your mess, not mine; I’m busy, you do it; it’s your problem/fault.

Is it hormones or has Libran’s infamous love for harmony and teamwork gone awry? Or maybe, just maybe, Libra loves to keep score.

Of course, this all has nothing to do with the fact that this New Moon falls exactly opposite my Moon in Aries on the 7th house cusp. It feels like a full moon to me.

Togetherness, so lovely, togetherness. Togetherness has its inherent challenges. Venus harmony helps us happily get along, to harmoniously function as a coupled or family unit. But Mars, God of War and Ego (now in self-protective Cancer) surely tails her. We each have our own wants, needs and desires which can and do clash with what the other’s. How does it feel to quell our Mars desires for Venus – to help a sister out? Sometimes it feels good and gracious. And if we’re honest, it sometimes feels uncomfortable. Itty bitty resentments creep in, when will it be my turn? When was the last time you helped me out?

It all gets me thinking about this Libran New Moon, a time of year reserved for new partnerships, socializing, romance, peace-promoting and cooperation. Venus is in sizzling Virgo for the second time this year; she is beautifully kind and feels classically under appreciated. Like the servant Cinderella who knows she’s a Queen, but life and love irritants distract from life’s pleasures and love-making.

The list grows for Venus in Virgo. Maybe we see ourselves as better than (more efficient, successful or in-shape) than our partner. Then we disproportionately blow up our partners character flaws, flaw-finding to avoid becoming more deeply involved with our feelings and our partners. We grow distrustful and withhold our love or affection – that which can only be given freely. In the heat of the moment, it doesn’t occur that our friend, partner or sibling might really want the best for us.

Yet Libra so appreciates the sweetness of life – the joy of art-making, beautifying, rlove relationship and the splendor of romance. Libra’s love energy buffers life’s extremes. But it’s also reminding me of the slogan: all’s fair in love and war. Interpersonal relationship brings up Mars the warrior, Venus the peacemaker, and Mercury the messenger – all of astrology’s personal planets. We can’t be whole without considering the whole of relatedness: how we fight, assert, communicate and graciously give. It seems we need levity and goodness as a balance. To quote my husband, who quoted Rodney King, at yet another night score-tallying in the kitchen, I too, hope someday we can all get along.