Lately, I have found myself thinking, “I could do this or that…but I love myself more.”

The more I used it, as a way to carry through on an action that was new, uncomfortable, or both, the more I realized the phrase “…I love myself more” was extremely helpful.

Especially for the intensely uncomfortable phase of moving from old habits into new ones.

The discomfort that accompanies releasing old habits of conditioning can be particularly vexing because you not only feel all that icky dis-resonance it’s time to clear up, the act of doing something new and different is (temporarily) uncomfortable, too. When athletes train they know there will be initial discomfort or pain involved when a new muscle is stretched in new ways. Reframing the discomfort we feel as loving can be just the reframe we need to energetically move into decisive change.

And giving yourself permission to do the same old thing, if you want, is incredibly freeing, too. 

Ultra-sensitive duo, Venus and Chiron, are now joined in the sky, in Aries. It is loving to be honest with our self about all the ways we feel hurt, disappointed, ignored, overlooked, betrayed, as long as we sit with our feelings and become willing to feel them completely.  It’s easy for the Ego to think that in order to feel better, others must change. Actually, it’s the honest acknowledgement and witnessing where/how we feel bad that gives us the ability to make new choices that will ultimately feel better for us. That’s the secret to empowered relationship (rarely is it: asking another person to change).

We just need to honestly face and feel the Truth of our feelings, not argue with them, and decide to love our self more. 

…Because there’s usually a “yeah, but…,” right? A reason for the Ego to argue with your Soul’s deeper Truth? That’s the old Ego conditioning butting up against the True Self’s response. We need to take those apart, too. Yet, what I’ve discovered is: I get to keep the objections and still decide …(yeah, but) I love myself more.

When we truly embody …I love myself more… as an energetic reality, in body and Soul, the obvious solution always appears – either as an action to take, or changed perception. We are not left hanging, waiting for the world, other people, to change for us. We get to more deeply respond to our own needs, desires. This shift is so empowering. And the rest, any leftover bad-feeling energies or lingering uncertainties, dissolve spontaneously, naturally.

Here’s how…I love myself more

It would be easy to push away how I felt excluded just now… I love myself more

To ignore how I felt when you talked to me in that way…I love myself more

To say “well, this is all you know how to do” as to why you do…I love myself more

It would be an old habit to gloss over the incongruence between your words and actions…I love myself more

To believe the words you tell me instead of trust what I know and feel…I love myself more

Follow the habit to bend myself into a new shape, to accommodate, because I don’t like how I feel around you…I love myself more

To stay in a connection that feels bad…(but) I love myself more   

To tell myself this the only way you know how to be, careful not to expect …I love myself more

I do not need for you to change anything for me…I love myself more

To know me deeply, intimately, to be in my own presence, is a privilege and a decision…This is me, loving myself more

I love myself more is the answer to everything. The Love that I AM always guides me to right action.

in love,

Jessica