One of the weirdest decisions I’ve had to make recently involved whether I wanted to go to the grocery store. My regular grocery day came and I felt conflicted about THE MASK. I am not going to go into my little internal debate, but illustrate what I did about it. I didn’t go to the store. I foraged through the pantry and extended our booty by another few days (I’m getting good at this. Months ago I started playing the “how long can we not go to the grocery store” game. I had been unwittingly, as many people have noted about their habits and decisions in months prior, preparing for this time).
I’ve come to understand that when there is no clear yes, there’s going to be another way. It’s just not here, yet.
It’s really that simple: Wait for the solid YES.
And it’s also that difficult to trust.
Because I, you, we understandably want to know. Your Ego wants to know how it’s going to get your groceries, when you’re going to get home from your trip abroad that’s been interminably extended, and when life will resume some level of normalcy. You understandably want to know exactly how, when and if it will all come together again.
It reminds me of watching movies, as a kid. I wanted the backstory; I never could understand how a movie could just start up in the middle of some strangers life, as though the director assumed I knew who they were, and what was going on. Then, the commercials always seemed interminable… I wanted to know what was going to happen next.
Guess what? I didn’t need to know any of it. It all worked itself out somehow. Just like I didn’t really need groceries that day.
Welcome to: This is your spiritual life. Many people think of spirituality as some blissed out state. That’s one very enticing and practical result of doing the work. Yet the means to that Bliss, “the Work”, if you will, is learning to flow, surrender, and shift out of trying to get the world to bend to what your Ego thinks it needs right now, and open up to Soul presence, that is, inner listening to the Truth. Because, in those moments of “stressing out”, if you honestly inquire, you will usually discover that a) you don’t actually need that thing you’re attaching your life’s survival to right now, and b) there is a more peaceful way to live. It just may involve shifting your perception, and some patience. (Only! Again, simple, not easy. We humans are more reluctant to willingly shift our perceptions than you might first think.)
For instance, feel into: You don’t have to know what to do next. You don’t have to figure it all out.
You only need the answer for this moment, and then the next one. What a relief that is!
When I think I need to have it all figured out, I feel very pressured. My energy starts chasing down solutions, like a squirrel looking for nuts, thinking “maybe this will work” for the long interminable winter of scarcity that I imagine in front of me. This practice, which I do not recommend, usually ends in mental bloating and energetic indigestion. No good creative idea or workable solution will ever find me in that state. I know, I’ve tried it.
Instead of thinking you need to chase down the answers to all the unknowns in the world right now, what if you simply asked for them to ARRIVE? It makes all the difference.
That doesn’t mean things are not figure out-able. Everything is. If I really needed food in my pantry the other day, you bet I would have figured it out. But I actually didn’t need to go to the store on that day. That’s what I mean; the Ego is really good at sending you into a fine frenzy, insisting there’s problem that does not need to, or cannot, be addressed right now. Yes: Cannot be addressed right now. Read that again. Often this is the case, with Spirit. It is either a Divine timing issue, or up to Divine Consciousness to make available, and both are outside of your control.
How will you know a thing Cannot be addressed right now? You will not get a clear YES or NO on an issue. Push it any further, and you will start feeling extreme stress. Because we tend to be uncomfortable with uncertainty, the undefined or unknowns, we often do try and force a yes or no and feel bad. There will always be an authentic YES, NO, or “Try again later” (remember the Magic 8 Ball?). Even if the Soul’s YES appears minor like, “YES I want to take a bath instead of watch this television show.” All Soul information is information- no matter size or scale. Hint: Stop looking for the big reveal. Not honoring what the Soul is saying creates a lot of stress in the world.
Again, this is your intuition and spirituality at work. Listen, accept, surrender, trust. It will always feel peaceful to live this way. It will not feel peaceful to think you need the answers that you don’t or can’t access right now.
To reiterate: a) Am I getting a Yes or No? b) Nothing? Meh? I guess I don’t need to know/do that thing now. What do I need to do instead? Go for a walk? Make dinner? Talk a bath? Oh, there’s a YES. That’s what a YES feels like. And, bonus: Let’s take a few seconds to notice this moment with some positive reinforcement, and commit it into our neurological circuitry, so we can remember, in the future, how good it feels to listen to and wait for the YES.
Rinse. Lather. Repeat. It takes a bit of commitment to regularly practice, but you can get the hang of it.
The Practice: Let the Answer Arrive
It is an abundant Universe. Nothing about our experience designed to torture or test. Life is, (and read this neutrally, as you would the weather report): for the pleasure of your experience. Yes, right now we’re having a corrective collective event that is challenging, and may change our lives. However, it doesn’t mean anything about your Soul’s purposeful destiny is being altered, at all. We may not feel so joyful, at times, and even need to work on areas where we are getting stuck in negativity, but we can always find ways to feel at peace.
The next time you notice yourself mentally ruminating on a perceived need for answers or solutions, after neutrally investigating whether this is actually a true need-to-know-or-do for you right now (always a good idea), why not ask for it to ARRIVE instead? It’s a subtle yet dramatic shift in approach. First, ground, root and center your energy (or, you won’t experience the yummy affirming sensations that follow). Connect, in your sensory energy body, with the “problem” you think you need to solve. Where do you feel it? Then, ask yourself: What would it be like to allow the answers to ARRIVE instead? Immediately, you will notice a sense of peace instead of struggle. You will experience a sense of relief: You don’t have to do all that heavy mental lifting…or need to know how/why/when right now!
Imagine a person frantically chasing down a chariot full of gold, always thinking he or she needs to run, plan, solve, figure out… in order to experience it. Exhausting. Now imagine sitting peacefully on your sofa, and that same chariot full of gold arriving, when and in the form it will – as a result of many factors outside of your control -AND- as a result of you sitting here in receptive presence. You have done the work: you have listened inward, responded to what you can, and you have asked. You will move in the appropriate way, in the appropriate moment, and in presence you are able recognize it. This is how to take your Divine rightful place as co-creator and shaper of your reality.
You can chase chariots and nuts all day, thinking that thing that you want is outside of you, in some fearful scarcity equation you need to figure out how to game- a very blustery and stressful way to live. Or you can live from your center and trust that your Soul is already ON IT. This is truly the difference between living in your Divinity, and not.
Because there will be a YES. The chariot will show up, eventually. Always does. For as long as you’re alive, and then beyond. You can argue with its timing and methods, or you can sink into what’s being asked of you right now. Allow this moment to fully ARRIVE, then the next one after that. Do this enough and you’ll realize: YOU have arrived. Everything you thought you were waiting for, all you need or want, is right here. Feel the relief and ease in this.