John & Yoko by Annie LeibovitzIf you speak the language of astrology, and you have a planet in the Seventh House, your story is WANTED for a research project. Your answers may be incorporated into a book.

Here’s what I’m looking for: first-person narratives over sound bites, depth instead of breadth. The questions below will get you going, but there are no ‘rules’. You can answer all, reply to a single topic and go deep, or nix these questions altogether and write about your Seventh House experience.

You don’t need a sophisticated astrological vocabulary to participate, only a general understanding of the planetary archetypes and willingness to share.

What’s in it for you?  Furthering the body of knowledge you love.

You can also answer these questions through your Seventh House cusp sign. I welcome everyone’s participation.

Please do not reply to this blog in the space below. Copy these questions into the body of an email and send your answers via email to

Now, imagine… I am pouring you a virtual cup of tea (or your hard alcoholic beverage of choice) and we’re settling in together to explore your pivotal, joyous, life-changing, humorous, crazy, confusing (insert your adjective here) experiences of relationship. You’ve got my full attention.

“The Seventh House partner is someone in whom we meet our match, who pushes us to the limits of our growth, who makes us respond as deeply as we are capable.” -Steven Forrest

Mandatory question: Birth date/place/time? What planet(s) do you have in the Seventh House?

Soul mates. For our purposes, I’m defining soul mates as people we love, and with whom we share an open-ended contract that could last forever -ie, not mystical Twin Flame theories etc. Tell me about your most significant soul mate(s).

Projection & Shadow. The Seventh House is the one place in our chart where we might hear our self say, with confidence, ‘that’s not me at all!’ No, it’s they who are the ‘crazy’ ‘commitment-phobe’ ‘angry’ ‘flaky’ (insert your adjective here) ones – not me! We can spend our entire relationship life butting heads with our polar opposite. Through your Seventh House sign or planet, tell me about your ‘Not Me’ by looking at the qualities you tend to reject or dislike, in others.

Dependency and Interdependency. The word ‘interdependent’ may be more politically correct than the word ‘dependent’, yet our Seventh House partners have something we need to go forward in our First House journey of self-actualization. Look through the eyes of your Seventh House planet: what help do you most need (and receive) from your partners?

  • Like a circuit of energy, our Seventh House planet also symbolizes our resources for relating, because these skills and abilities help us get what we most need from them. What resources do you offer your partners?

Role models vs. Suppliers. Our Seventh House partners have something we need, but ideally they are the ‘role model’ and not the ‘supplier’. How have your Seventh House partners role-modeled that planet for you?

  • Have you ever asked another to be the ‘supplier’ of your (planet’s) need? How did that work/not work for you?

Love & commitment. What is your experience of committed partnership?

To love, honor and negotiate. When we’re in a relationship many of us find that over time our agreements to each other changes. Have you asked your partnership to accommodate your evolving needs? What needs have partners been unable to meet for you?

Trust and surrender. To taste the fruits of commitment, we must first trust and surrender to one another. Share any stories you care to share about trust, earning one another’s trust, broken trust, and fears of betrayal. Do they earn your trust (and how?) or do you give it freely? Is it hard or easy for you to surrender to another person?

Equality. One way we always know we’re in a Seventh House relationship (versus any other house) is that we’re with our equals. Their perspective may not mirror ours exactly, nor will they possess our same strengths, but we are with our equal.

  • How have you seen this at play in your partnerships? What about in your choice of partners?

Blind spots. One of the gifts of being in a relationship with our equal is that we take their feedback in because we respect them. This is helpful in identifying our blind spots. ‘Blind spots’ are parts of our character we overlook or would rather not see, and which when first named can make us feel misunderstood or angry. A function of Seventh House relationships is to fill in the holes in our self-perception, providing side-view mirrors for what we can’t see in our self.

  • Have your significant relationships helped you identify your blind spots? How?

Share your story. Do you have a story about your Seventh House planet that you’re just dying to tell?

Seventh House words to spark your imagination: input, negotiation, Shadow, completion, help, relationship of equals, worthy opponent, love, dependency, interdependency, compromise, trust, shadow, cooperation, soul mates, open enemies, marriage, rivalry, intimacy, business partners, contracts with others, ‘you complete me’, ‘opposites attract’.

Thank you for your participation!