Frustration & The Intuitive Self

by | Aug 25, 2020 | Fun | 5 comments

Yesterday, looking for a spool of raffia ribbon I had *just* used, it was all too easy to become frustrated and tell myself I was having a perimenopause moment. That’s what my critical mind told me. But I was actually in my Intuitive Self.

It took a question to allow that guidance to find me, a question that made all the difference. When frustration arose at not finding what I wanted, instead of allowing that frustration be true I decided to tune inward and ask myself what else I might I find rummaging around for in that drawer — perhaps stuff I wasn’t aware I needed or wanted?

I recentered, finding: A frame for a watercolor my deceased grandmother had painted which prompted a text to my Uncle who replied excitedly back with more art he wanted to send me. And a very meaningful piggy bank I had been wanting to send my niece for years, for whom I just happened to have an open box send-ready.

Gifts! Magic! When magic and synchronicity teach me more about my Expanded Self it’s a top ten on my perfect day playlist. My Intuitive Self had been guiding me toward this discovery all along. (A few minutes later, I remembered where I had put the raffia- somewhere entirely else). It was a great lesson in remembering/integrating this:

Instead of thinking about what’s being taken away, look at what is being given you.

Repeat: Instead of thinking about what’s being taken away, look at what is being given you.

And a good reminder for these times, isn’t it?

And perhaps it is becoming vital to realize, for this reason: these times require our ongoing dedication to living in Truth. When we are operating from a perception of what we lack, we miss the chance for our Soul to guide us to new discoveries.

This is also how Intuition works. Since intuitive guidance comes from the Soul, which is everything and everywhere, the Divine abundance of who we are, in order to receive guidance we have to assume it’s all right here for us. It’s happening. Everything we ever needed or wanted is already here, and as we become willing to receive it, it will be revealed in time.

To drive this point home for me, so I could write this to you, the intuitive themes continued when I made a trip to the post office. I parked, put the money in the meter, and stood in line for a long while. Yes, I started to grow impatient, and anxious about the parking meter which I had only fed enough money for ten minutes – a paltry amount of time for a quarter. That’s when I heard the postmistress advise the girl in front of me that the meters behind the post office are half the price of those on the street, where I had parked. I noted this piece of information, which I had needed and not known I had needed.

Next, arriving at the counter, I was politely told I was using a “by weight” box, which looked almost exactly the same as flat rate mail, and would need to repackage. Frustration, again! Now I am starting to catch onto my Soul’s agenda. Frustration, as a first response, to things not going my Ego’s way, was a distraction from my own Intuitive Guidance. Instead of thinking about what’s being taken away, look at what is being given you. Deep breath. I am starting a business involving frequent shipping… this information will save me a lot of time. I noted this piece of information, which I had needed and not known I had needed.

Finally, in the act of repackaging and choosing my new box, I notice all of the fees for the flat rate boxes are considerably different from what my webmaster had just programmed into my website, and different from what is published on many of the websites I consulted. I noted this piece of information, which I had needed and not known I had needed.

What of this theme of frustration? Mars in Aries is making an exact square to Saturn in Capricorn right now now, and will again on 9/29… a theme which will still continue through mid-December since Mars will turn retrograde on 9/11/20 (and Saturn remains in Capricorn until mid-December, which is square Mars by sign and so keeps them in cahoots till then).

Classically, this aspect of frustrated desire, of “driving with the breaks on,” requires we take things slower. Time, patience, perseverance pay off. But what to do with the energy of this, in our bodies? It’s the belief that we are being thwarted creating the energy of frustration and friction. It is believing we are being denied something we want to experience, or conversely that we are experiencing something we don’t want to be experiencing. This is the real issue.

It is easy to get caught up in not having, in believing yourself to not be getting what you want. Fundamentally, the Ego operates from a paradigm of lack. That is a sign you are in your Ego. Yet it’s important to note that when you are coming from this place of “not have”, you close down to Guidance. Because every time you tell yourself you don’t have, you can’t, you aren’t…you are negating the very Divinity of your being, your I AM – where your Intuitive Self lives, thrives and guides you.

Here is the Truth: You are everything. You are the I AM. You are the stuff of God, the Creator, and therefore everything happening through you, everything you experience, is happening for you. Every time you say I can’t, I don’t have, I’m not enough, etc… You are stepping out of I AM and essentially saying I AM NOT. Now, you are I AM NOT. This is what I experience as frustration. When I am frustrated, I am telling myself I AM NOT. Frustration, the energy of it, is actually the frustration of lying to myself. I am telling myself that I AM NOT and my Divinity is like, really, you’re going to believe that? How frustrating to be you right now. When I am telling myself that I cannot have, I am in opposition to the very fact of I AM.

Can you see how this is true?

It is the difference between being the kid standing outside the candy store, or BEING the candy store. When you assume that you are the kid, you will be in a special hell called I AM NOT (I don’t have). When you assume you ARE the candy store, you become the provider of all solutions, the answers to your questions awaiting discovery. You know that for everything you desire, it’s just a matter of time. You also decide that for any “problem” you will always find a way to figure it out.

Are you in your Divinity or are you outside of it? Right now, are you in I AM or are you in I AM NOT? One answer leads to a magical, rich, life of synchronicity, gifts. The other creates a wall of frustration between you and all you think you don’t have…

For the Intuitive, this Mars-Saturn aspect is an opportunity to slow down and notice when you are in your I AM NOT versus your I AM. Intuitive Guidance only flows from the I AM; Intuitive Guidance is overlooked entirely in the I AM NOT. Had I stayed in frustration of I AM NOT, I would have missed out on all the magic and wonder that my Soul had in store for me.

We all go back and forth between being in our Divinity and being in our Ego. It’s normal and natural. At a certain point, we can ask: Don’t I have a choice in this? We can decide to step out of the Ego and into our Divinity. We can become fluid in this.

So: Do you want to lead a life filled with magic, synchronicity and inner guidance? We are in one of those periods of growth when getting clear on who we truly are makes all the difference in our experience of our Self, and our life!




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  1. Valerie BE

    Love this, Jessica! Looking forward to remembering, the next time frustration hits, to look instead for the opportunities behind it. Thank you. PS This comment font is fun

  2. Mary

    Thank you very, very much, Jessica!
    Especially for giving me the insight that Ego operates from a paradigm of lack.

    Every day I read the daily wisdom I receive from the Sri Nisargadatta app.
    The most important part these teachings tell me is to be with the ‘I am’ as much as possible.
    As I see this is to be like a child that has just arrived in the two dimensional state, but is still in touch with Divinity.

    And then – slowly – as the separate Self I started to lose this contact with Divinity.

    Until something happened to me that has been heartbreaking.
    Through that experience I – slowly – regained contact with Divinity.

    It is now that I believe a divine part within has been guiding me to get to understand that there is no separate Self.
    That all that has happened is consciousness helping me to become aware and change the way I interpret life.

    This divine part within has given me another wisdom.
    This says the answer is there before the question arises.

    Being in touch with this divine part has now become the most important to me.
    I truly believe this guidance brought and will bring me anything that is important to guide the original seed through experiences to full blossom and fragrance.

    Every time I read your insights I feel very much connected to you.
    It makes me very grateful for all the wisdom you share with us!

    With lots of love, Mary

  3. Dora

    thank you, thank you, thank you

    (I have already shared this with a couple of friends as it resonated with all kinds of discussions and will probably will continue to do so 😉
    so, thank you!)

  4. Lizzie

    Hi Jessica, I just happened onto your site. I was looking for information on planets transiting the third house. But I believe the divine universe sent me here today because I needed to hear your message about frustration. In May, my job furloughed me. I was scared, but then my fear turned to relief I knew intuitively something was going on weeks before, but I had ignored it. This summer has been my journey of self, of dark night of the soul as I came to terms with all the things in my life I had been ignoring or thought I couldn’t have. Friday I received a call from my job that put me into such anxiety that I couldn’t enjoy the conference I’d had signed up for and it dampened my spirit. I realized during my forced sabbatical that I hated my job and I really didn’t like the people I worked for or with. Having this freedom to explore myself as I have never done before was life changing and I didn’t want it to end. You just showed me in this post that I created frustration for myself and truly have not accepted the gift this will be by returning because I will have funds to explore the things I truly want in my life. Thank you for this gift. Namaste from a fellow Cancer sun, scorpio ascendent and Pisces moon with a Leo Midheaven and Aries North Node. 😉

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